Stupid Worthless Bitch

As my dawg Obama sez... "What does she DO?"
Oil up the guillotine, Marie Antoinette's neck is lookin' ready.

This great list stolen from EvilBible.com, apparently some sort of kindergarten-level one-topic primer for the newly anti-theist. Some great stuff, though.

Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian

10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.

He almost has the cadence of a preacher, but too much Jesse Jackson and not enough Al Sharpton in this delivery.
Keep practicing, Obama and listen to some Snoop Dogg to get a taste of smooth delivery. But damn, it's good to know this youngun can hit back.
Fuck Romney, fuck McCain and doublefuck all Republican voters.
Praise Darwin.
Obama in '08!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Schroedinger's LOLCat

Only a few will get this one.

"Open letter to Obama" by rapper Jin, check it out, y'all.

Waiter Glossary?

Mr Creosote from Monty Python's "Meaning of Life"

Waiter Glossary:
"Would you care to hear tonight's specials?" = Suuuccckkkkers....
"Of course, sir" = Fuck you, jackass
"I'll be happy to" = And the horse you rode in on.
"I'll check on that right away" = I'm about one second away from stabbing you with my substandard, company-issued corkscrew.


Feel free to add to this list, especially if you've ever waited tables.

Support the troops? What does that mean??? Deny them a light at the end of their tunnel? To what ends? What can possibly be won now? These are people, somebody's beloved relative, everyone should read this and understand what our poor troops are going through, for no reason, reason is absent here. Supporting the troops should mean bringing them home, fucking right fucking now. Fuck.

HOLY SHIT!!!!

Emo Emo

An oldie but goodie, now with mouse-over fun and new critters!
FACES OF METH

Good tune by slightly creepy family act The Wrights

I know you don't feel the way you used to
Did the best you could I know you tried
Oh hunni, don'tcha feel to bad
I ain't really all that sad
I've been down this road a million times

A few more days and it'll all be over
I read all the books on gettin' by
Oh hunni, if you see me cryin'
Don't you worry I'll be fine
I've been down this road a million times

And let me make just one thing clear
My heart won't lie about the way I feel
I've taken all the love I could possibly steal
I've been down this road a million times

If you ever get to feelin' lonesome
Just around the way c'mon by
It's ok if you don't stay long
I'll be fine on my own
I've been down this road a million times

Yea it's ok if you don't stay long
I'll be fine on my own
I've been down this road a million times

Oh, I've been down this road a million times
Oh, I've been down this road a million times

Here's the vid at CMT, requires Internet Exploder and the patience to sit thru some fucked up commercial.

Gram Parsons was one of the finest singer/songwriters ever in America. He died in 1973, but left an enduring ...blah blah blah.
He was the only man ever to match Emmylou Harris' perfect singing in many beautiful duets.
This vid is my favorite (and most everyone else's that know of him) song by Gram Parsons.

Pat Condell is the best truth speaker since Richard Dawkins, with nearly the same accent, but way more vitriol and humor. Please view his vids on YouTube or MySpace.

Geek Rock

Ya know, Crackerdog, I'm no big fan of LOTR imagery and only a lukewarm fan of cheesemetal, but put the two together and it's a lot of fun! Thank you for introducing me to Within Temptation. This must be who Evanescence wishes they were.

Bye bye Jerry!

Oh, and fuck you, you worthless shitbag. Love, the Immoral Minority. As usual, Rude Pundit expresses my thoughts o so much better than I could.

Chuckanut

Excellent kayaking today, drove the very long way to Larrabee State Park and met my friend Abdul-Kareem-Al-Habar-Muhammed-Ghengis the Jihadist for a paddle around the bay, then Caesar salad and sushi at The Big Fat Fish Company. Eclectic menu, too many cuisines on one page, with plenty of questionable items like Halibut Puttanesca, but damn was that sushi good. The Hefeweizin wasn't too bad either. Still no shots of my own, so here's some I stole from somebody of where we were paddling. Oh, yeah, Dad's in the psych ward. Yay!

$100 more every month

The landlord is raising the rent. It's a nice place, though. I don't want to leave it, but in the winter I won't be able to pay rent and heat.
Sigh.
Good kayaking today, no new pics, so here's some old ones.

Bald-Faced Hornets

Some of these enormous beasties have been flying in through my permanently open doors and windows. (My friends say "Why don't you lock your house?" I say, "If I get burglarized, why replace a broken window too?")
The smarter ones do a u-turn, but of course 51% are complete idiots, just like voters. Those ones bang angrily on the window until the cat hears about it. Then I gotta kill 'em. While looking up info on these giant pain inducing insects from hell, I came across this really fun page on the subject. The author never mentions killing them or destroying their nests. Great images, too!